What is the one question you hate the most?

I hate the following question:

So, tell me about yourself.

It's a statement with a question. It says, wow me and make me want to pay attention to you. I never know what to say to this. It makes me draw a blank, not because I don't know who I am, but because I don't know what you want to know...lol...

I often wonder who the person was and what they were doing when they came up with what is now a universal interview question. I think for the most part, the person was bored with who they were talking to and just wanted that person to speak with out having to listen.

Interviews are really something I should excell at by now. I mean I have been through enough of them because of all the moves to have it down to a science. Yet, when a person asks me that single statement /question, I have yet to find a good formula. I'm a talented, creative person with a flare for business who constantly excells at blowing away the competition in any kind of sales....lmao...so if I feed that line of crap to someone, I wonder what they would think. If someone fed me that line, I would wonder how long they practiced it in the mirror.

I would love to hear some of the answers you have given to this question during an interview. I look forward to lots of laughs...smiles...hugs...

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Judgement based on Religion

This is sparked by an interesting conversation about religion on a friend's page. I'm so passionate about it that I felt is was necessary to post it on my blog. All that I have said is from a conversation.

About the Ten Commandments
Truth be told, if you are looking at it from a religious stand point then God wrote them. This is where faith comes into play. I believe in God. That doesn't mean I make it my personal vendetta to make everyone be afraid and or shove it down their throats. It's unfair and not right. There are so many different beliefs and if you ask me, in some way they are all in a way symbolically the same. Treat others the way you want treated. Don't cause harm to anyone else, and find a balance within. Why should we as human beings limit our spiritual growth by subjecting ourselves to one narrow belief when there are so many more out there we can all learn wisdom from? In the long run, it's about faith. You have it or you don't. Either way, it's not my place to judge you or anyone else for their beliefs. That's not why I'm here. I'm amazed by the fact that with all the talk of free speech, there are people who would try to use scare tactics as a way to force someone to believe the way they believe. The fact of the matter is, if we wish to have freedom of speech, then we need to be able to listen to a person who is standing on a soap box preaching against that which we ourselves have held up and fought for our entire lives. We must do this without fear of judgement or incitement to riotous acts. When it comes down to it, belief in any system, no matter which religion, is a personal choice and should be respected. I meant it when I told Tracie that she has more discipline than I...such a beautiful thing to try to live by. That's not to say that hers is the only way. Just the whole idea of finding the balance within your self to live in such a disciplined manner is something I'm not sure I could accomplish.


If we look at the Bible as a nothing more than a record of history, then we must assume that what we read in there is an account based on the perception at the time. ie, Moses went up the mountain and came down with ten laws we were suppose to live by...The Ten Commandments. Who am I to say that isn't correct. I'm not sorry to say, I believe in the story and that it is accurately depicted in the Bible. That is where my faith is. However, that doesn't mean I sit in judgement of others whose faith is elsewhere. Faith is a word that stands for a lot of things. It is something we should have in humanity and ourselves. It's easy to lose and hard to get back. It should be treated with respect and should be shared when asked about...not used as a tool for fear. Fear breeds hate and that is a disease that needs vaccinated. James, be yourself first and always. I would trust that above any blind leading the blind individual who doesn't want to listen to how you feel about a subject that should be used to lift people up, not bring them down.

About War

I know that I said all I had to say, but that changed when you said you don't know of Christians who are going out and starting wars. We can start with the Crusades and work our way to the present. The fact more people have died in the name of Christianity then any other religion. I too believe in God and Jesus, but-I know the history and recognize the validity and wisdom of listening to others who believe different. I have learned the difference between religion and spirituality by listening to my fellow humans. I have but one simple question to ask...how can any of us be a work in progress if we are not willing to listen to one another? That is for all of us to do and the only way we can learn. Having an open mind and seeing all the wonderful things and people in this world is why we are here...So many times we have all judged one another for no other reason then because we are unwilling to open our hearts and minds to understand one another. We are fighting a battle even now. That battle is one of hatred. It's dressed in the clothing of terrorism and even carries a gun. How can we, as a species survive if we are unwilling to do the one thing God commanded. Treat others as we wish to be treated. (Joann's paraphrase) I understand the reason for all that you have said. However, isn't it always better to forgive and understand then to condemn and accuse when we by all rights have no legs to stand on. Tami said simple and best...Judge not lest ye be judged. We can all quote the Bible. We all have a different perception when it comes to what things mean. I think we can all agree on the simplest of terms that has been placed on us though, treat those the way we want treated. If we can all do that simplest of things...then I believe we could and would be able to put a stop to so many things that are going on int he world today. With an open mind and an open heart we can all make a change.

In truth, I am a Christian, I have very strong beliefs about the Bible and what it means to me. I don't believe it should be used as a weapon of fear but rather as a way to convey love and understanding. I have said it before and I'll say it again. I have a lot of friends of other religions. I have learned so many wonderful and wise things from them. Their spirituality has touched my life more than any threat of going to hell ever could. I respect the right to have different beliefs and respect the fact that there are those out there who have and can teach me something different that will make me grow as a person. Why should we fight about something that is suppose to lift us up as people and make our souls grow?

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STOP THE HATRED

"It can be argued that hatred is a living thing. More destructive than any weapon, more insidious than any sin. Hatred can shatter families, topple nations and given time, unmake the world." ~ C. D. Bennett~

Hatred is a disease for which there is no vaccination. How is it, that so many people are able to sit in judgement about another person's life. We see it everyday on the news and even in the magazines we read. We see rumors about people we don't know and are drawn to them. Don't we have enough to worry about without trying to figure out what is going on with some movie star's divorce?

The fact is that we all are just trying to live our lives in the best way we see fit. Why does it have to include hating someone because they don't believe the way you do, or they have a different sexual preference? Why not take a person based on how they behave as an individual? If a person treats you  good and fair and honest, shouldn't they be treated with the same respect?

It amazes me that we are living in a time with so much technology and so much individual free spirit and we can't seem to get past the same old issues. Judgement of others just for the sake of judging. For those who sit on their pedestal, I say get a life. Stop spreading hate. Stop thinking you are holier than thou and get out there and make a difference. What better place to start, then with yourself?

We have problems in this world that are bigger than a single person can handle. We all need to do our part by not giving in to hate. We need to set an example through our own actions and behaviors. It isn't going to be easy, but, if just one person does it, then so will others. That is how we vaccinate hate.

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This is a DIGG test

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Celebrate Our Differences

I've been reading a lot of articles lately that have made me think, "What were they thinking?"
A man was arrested for holding a woman against her will after he bailed her out of jail. The man made her do sexual favors and clean up after him in return for bailing her out.

A Florida minister, plans on burning copies of the Koran on 9/11. He says it's to comemorate 9/11. I say it's to get free PR for his novel about hatred.

The point to these stories, THEY ARE ALL REAL!! As scary as it is to think about, they are living among us with little regard to anyone around them.

Since when is it ok in the country to own a slave, and pretend we are part of some sort of new Nazi regime? I really thought we were past things like this. With that being said, it only takes a small spark to spread both love and hate. It's a shame people are choosing to put eachother down instead of lifting up one another. We should all celebrate the things that make us different and unique. We aren't going to walk around like shiny happy people, but stopping the hatred before it spreads even more would be a good start.

Why is it, everyone seems to want to tell you how to live your life as appose to paying attention to their own? We all have flaws and make poor choices. We all have good things about us and make good choices. Why not celebrate those things that make us individuals. Just imagine how this world would be if we were to all look the same, dress the same, think the same. Gone would be the great creative minds that make life fun. The inventors of tomorrow would no longer come up with the things that make life easier.

As you can see, it's something I'm passionate about. Let's all celebrate who we are as people.

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Surreal Moments

      What is a surreal moment? When is something so wonderful that it makes you think, "Wow, is this really happening to me?" Yeah, that would describe my life in the last couple weeks. I have often wondered what I would do if I ever had a moment like that.

      I froze for a minute. That's what I did when I read the following words. "I'm sending you a contract, print it out and sign both copies and mail them to the address provided." I had an agent. Yeah, I froze. I didn't know if I was dreaming or if it was real.

      Those moments only come around a couple times maybe a few more. The thing I learned is yes, it's real. What an amazing feeling that is. For me, I couldn't move. I just sat in my chair staring at the screen reading it over and over again. to make sure I was reading it right, I read it out loud. Not once, not twice, but three times. Then, when I was sure I read that right. I raced out of the house to tell my fiance' about it. It has been a week and I'm still feeling like all if it is surreal. It's all a dream. holy cow what a dream it is...I'll take this ride anytime.

      That single contract is a chance to get a ticket to the show. What a trip that's going to be...there isn't any standing in line. It's just a ticket. A validation that says I was here. I did it. I made it. I existed. What an amazing thing that is going to feel like. No matter what, the ticket to the show is where we all want to be. It doesn't even have to be a golden ticket, just a ticket with my name on it. What a day...that's it...what a day...smiles...

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      There are no more excuses left for me. I realized that last night when I was working on my novel. I have been signed by an agent...there are no more excuses left. I had to say that again, because for the first time in my life, it's true. I find that somewhat strange because there is always something that would get in the way of what I'm trying to accomplish. But, here it is...the key to the door I have been trying to step through for years.

      I have to say it's a freeing experience, the lack of excuses. I feel like I have stepped out of the shadow and let the light shine. My light. My heart. My work. Another strange strange thing is this, it's mine...lol...I'm always the one who is congratulating those around me. I'm genuinely happy for all my friends who have accomplished what they set out to do. For the first time in my life, I'm the one being congratulated for something I set out to do. When I posted on FB about being signed, I was overwhelmed by the response of congratulatory statements. I really didn't know what to think or how to feel accept to say thank you to everyone. The whole experience has been surreal. Have I stepped into another person's body through some strange experiment? Did someone change the programming in the Matrix? These are all logical questions in my world...lol...

      There are no more excuses left, and I have to say this. Try putting the excuses aside today. Do it for one day. You can't imagine what a freeing experience it is. Life has a way of taking you where you are suppose to be. You may make choices that lead elsewhere, but life will get you there eventually, no matter what you do. My whole life is a testament to that.

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A Single Moment

      What a week I'm having...OMG!!! Ok well this whole blog has been about a single moment. I had one yesterday. It's something that is going to change my life as I know it. I just don't know how yet. I was signed by an agent yesterday. Her name is Chamein Canton. I have been on cloud nine since this moment happened.

      I have to tell you though, when I tried telling my family and friends, they didn't know what that meant. They asked how much money I was going to make from my novel. I laughed a little about this. I mean who can blame them really. For the most part, those who don't write and research don't understand all the hoops you have to jump through to get in black and white. That's ok though, because my mom and dad are proud and my sister couldn't be more excited. The truth is all of this is so surreal for me. It feels a lot like one of those interviews when you hear, "I was walking around the store and this casting director came up to me and now here I am."  That's what I feel like right now. I won a ticket to the show. What an awesome thing that is!!!!

      All of this is thanks to a fellow writer named James Weil. He has written a novel called Swiss Chocolate. It's slated to be out in a couple weeks. It's a wonderful story about the life of a boy who grows into manhood and all he went through to get there. I read the first chapter and was blown away by it. Immediately, I'm rooting for the boy with the distant father and mother who is too far gone to care. The first chapter made me laugh and cry at the same time. You have to check it out...smiles...

      As I was saying, James believed in me. He even believed in me during times when I had no idea what I was thinking...lol...So, here it is, the single moment; I was signed by an agent. I know I have said it twice, but I can't help it. I'm so excited by it and saying it makes it real...smiles....hugs...

      This goes to show, no matter what you dream about in life, you can achieve it. All it takes is persistence and never giving up. EVER!!!

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A Single Moment

      I'm sitting here right now, wondering what I'm going to write. For the most part, this blog has been about the single moments that change our lives. What about the places that change them? Is there a such thing as a place that changes your life?

      When I was a kid, I used to go to a place called Balboa Park in San Diego just to walk around. You may be thinking this park was just a park. In all actuality, this park was like a miniature renaissance fair. There were fortune tellers, jugglers, musicians and even artists roaming the park on a daily basis. You never knew who or what you would run into. The creative vibes always flowed through the park without fear or hesitation.  When I first went there, I had this idea that anything creative was a waste of my time and energy. This is because I was raised believing that you had to be practical in life in order to make it. The thing is, this mold didn't always fit me. I was impulsive and leaped before I looked. I liked not knowing what was coming next. I enjoyed writing and listening to my muse. I didn't like sitting in the class rooms and listening to some boring teacher talk about all the wonderful applications of math or things like that.

      While I was at the park one day, I struck up a conversation with a woman who was a psychic. At the time, I didn't know she was a psychic. She was sitting on the ground with her legs crossed and a kid tried to take her purse. By accident, I managed to trip him. I don't know how because all I did was turn around at the right time. He dropped her purse and I took it back to her. I sat there for a while talking to her about life, love and the future. Funny thing is this, I had never spoke about any of this to anyone. She told me that my life would be free when I decided to follow my path. Being the kid I was, I shrugged it off and thanked her for the conversation.

       It wasn't until much later that I recalled her words. I have to say that she was correct. When I stopped fighting and making plans, and just went with the flow of life, it eased up on me enough to see what I needed to do for me.

      There are those who would say that's not the way to live. You know, going with the flow of it all. For those who say that, I say this: Life happens when you're busy planning. The thing is, for me, making plans never seemed to work. Outside forces beyond my control always managed to step in and flush the plans I had. The day I stopped making plans was the day I was free to do what I wanted. It was the day I decided to write my first novel. I didn't know where it would take me or even how far into the journey I was going to get, but that didn't matter. What mattered was for the first time in my life, I felt like I was doing what I was meant to do. That novel is now sitting in a disk, completed. It was the proof I needed to see that I could do this. Now all I needed were the tools.

      The tools are important in anything you plan on doing. I already loved reading, so now I had to practice writing. It has taken years of practice to get to the point I'm at now. I still mess up on the grammar, but the flow of the story is good. I'll take that any day. I don't know about anyone else, but, when I decided to do what I wanted, this whole other world opened up to me. The question remains: Can a place change your life?

      The following was sent to me by Fred Everson. It's about a place that changed his life and the lives of his friends.

      ‎34 years ago I'm in this bar. The head bouncer recognizes my tall friend as a former student from grammar school and hires him as a bouncer. We rent a house on the Jersey shore, both get hired eventually, make a bunch of new friends, and marry girlfriends met in the bars. That night changed a lot of lives. The Sea Girt Inn is long gone, but everybody who ever worked there, or partied there has never forgotten.

      I have to say that yes, a place can change your life. Conversations that are held with people sometimes are brought up in the future. Advice is given when we least expect it when we are where we are suppose to be. The universe has a way of guiding us to where we are suppose to be. I've said it before and I'll say it again, I believe everything happens for a reason. If I hadn't turned around at the right moment, I never would have had that conversation with the nice lady and she wouldn't have told me not to fight my own path.

      Thank you Fred or sharing a place in your life that changed it for the better. I think we all have places like that. Hmmm, I feel another topic coming on...lol...

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A Single Moment

      What an adventure this weekend was!! I was without my Internet connection all weekend and it drove me CRAZY!!! I'm so happy to be back on.

      As you know, on Mondays I'm doing a book review. The novel I would like to talk about is called Rogues By Denyse' Bridger.

Rogues is a compilation of three short stories.

The first, Angel Fire is about a pirate named Jack Stanton. He is bold and beautiful and has a somewhat tarnished reputation. I can't tell you more than that without giving too much away. This story is a sexy blend of fun and fantasy.

The second story is called Storm- Singer. This is a vampire story. A mythical island called Nyx is the setting for this compelling story about a Princess who is sent to take back what belongs to her people. She is a hero, bold beautiful and full of spunk. I love that the hero of the story is a woman. That makes it more fun for me to read.

The third story is called Phantom's Lair:  Katheryn Hollinsworth is determined to choose her own path, and follow her heart. When she meets a man known only as The Phantom, she falls in love. Will she ever be able to take her future back or will she always be left tarnished by the love she has in her heart?  Once again, Denyse' shows that women are beautiful, strong, sexy beings with an amazing capacity for love and forgiveness.

I love her writing. She has this amazing ability to whisk you away into another time and place. She isn't afraid to make her female characters the herons and gives them all great depth and longing to be their own women and live their lives the way they choose. Her descriptions take you away and make you feel like you are there. I strongly recommend picking up Rogues...three love stories that will take you into different passionate worlds.

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      This weekend I lost my Internet connection through no fault of my own. I felt lost without being able to work on my blog and chatting with my friends. A good think did come out of it though. I was able to spend a lot of time writing. I didn't have my music, but still, the characters I have been creating took me away on a GREAT adventure!! I have said it before and I'll say it again, I love writing. It also gave me time to do a little reading. I checked out the latest Terry Brooks novel. I can't wait to read it and review it on here too....smiles...

      This blog has been changing my life and everything I think about when it comes to life. For today, I'm going to hold off on a "Single Moment" that was sent in and post one of my own.

      As you all know, or for those who don't. I have been looking for a job. Recently a post opened up as a TA at the local school system. It is perfect. It's just what I've been looking for. I'm so excited by the prospect for this new position. Please pray for me and hope I get the position. It has good benefits, and since it is in the school system, I don't have to worry about daycare for the kids when it's vacation time. It is the possibility of something better. That is why I have been doing everything. Just for the possibility. I will keep you posted on the out come. Thank you sooo much for joining me on this adventure....smiles...

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A Single Moment

     What is it that we see when we look at people? What is the first thing you notice when you meet someone? Is it the hair or maybe it's what they're wearing? When I meet someone for the first time, I notice their eyes first. You can see a lot about a person when you look into their eyes. There is a wide range of emotions that comes from it. If you really want to know a person, you look into their eyes.

      Once in a while, I go to Ala non meetings for a little support and to give a little support to those who need it. When it's a birthday meeting the Ala non group and the AA group comes together to celebrate individuals sobriety. It's really a wonderful support system for those who need it. A new person came into the meeting that night. It was one of the few times a person instantly gave me the chills. I looked into his eyes and could hate and anger. It was hidden behind the fake smile he gave the group. Two weeks later the man was arrested for spousal abuse and attempted man slaughter. She was so injured, and beaten so bad that they rushed her to a bigger hospital. I went there to visit her. I brought her magazines and pictures of her children which she couldn't look at because her face was so bruised her eyes were swollen shut. I hated being right about the man. She is now recovered, but she is still skittish when it comes to men. What he took from her was more than just a loss of control. He stole her ability to trust herself.

      That ability to trust yourself is one of the most instincts we have as people. It's a little voice in their heads or a feeling in your stomach that says stop, don't do that; somethings coming. It's an instinct we are all born with. The ability to trust yourself is at its purest when you're a child. I always watch my little ones reactions to people when they are first introduced. They always see the truth.

The following was sent to me by a woman named Angela Morrell Arnold. I have had several conversations with her. She is a wonderful person with a heart of gold. I have a hard time seeing anything mean coming from her.

Angela Morrell Arnold

In 1996, my daughter, her boyfriend & I use to go to Salt Lake to visit her boyfriends sister & brother-in-law. The Apartment manager lived across the hall & I thought he was scary. One visit, my daughter was giving me a tattoo on my boob (yep!). She couldn't get the shading to where she was happy with it. The brother-...in-law told us to go across the hall to "scary" Mark. I normally would have stayed away! I got a happy giddy feeling, went over, got his advice. I have a beautiful tattoo and Mark & I were married 6 weeks later! Glad I followed that instinct!

      When you really look into someones eyes, and trust your own instincts, wonderful things happen. If someone takes that ability, it takes a part of a their soul. It causes self doubt and feelings of worthlessness. There is enough in this world that causes that without us doing it to one another. When I look into someones eyes, I really look, I trust my gut and go with it. I prey everyday that my friend will be able to do that again one day. She deserves to be happy and more than anything, she deserves to have her trust in herself. We all deserve that.

      Like I said earlier, I look into the eyes first. I trust my gut when it comes to what I see. Always follow your gut. There is a reason you feel what you feel. Oh how different my life would be today, if I had only trusted myself.  With time, comes wisdom, mistakes are made, lessons are learned. They will be fewer if you trust your gut!!

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A Single Moment

      YES!!! Before I get started, I wanted to tell you about how close I am to finishing the bones of I AM WOLF. It is such an awesome thing to know that I have created something like this. I have posted the first chapter to it on a page under "My Projects". I have received GREAT comments on my Fb wall and people are even sharing it on their wall. What an honor that is.

      So, now onto the blog.

      When I was a child, I would get in trouble all the time. With that trouble came the punishment, grounding without tv and radio. Those who remember the days without video games will understand how terrible this was for me. Oh My God how was I ever going to spend my time. No tv, no radio and absolutely NO going outside. I have to thank my parents for this one. Out of those groundings, and believe me there were a lot of them, came my love of reading and passion for writing. Here I am today, working on my third novel. What a thrill that is. There are two novels that will forever collect dust. I don't know what to say about them accept they are practice. That's what it takes to make it in any business, lots and lots and lots of practice.

      I bet your wondering why I chose this topic today, you know, since I wrote about writing a few weeks ago. It's simple really. The following story was sent in by my friend, and now partner on a new blog called Slaves to the Muse. She is a fellow writer who bring passion to her work. I look forward to working with her on this venture.

Tami Snow

 Ok then. Another one of my "eureka" moments is when I finished my first novel. I never thought in a million years that I could write something so extensive. And I certainly never thought I could write for a living. It was always something I... did for enjoyment or to release pent up energy. It's sort of ironic in that I always professed that I would never partake in an occupation that I'd have to perch myself behind a computer screen for a career. Now there is nothing I'd rather do for a living. The intense feeling of gratification I feel creating worlds is like no other. I highly recommend it!

      The point to all this is simple. If you have a dream, go for it. Don't let you hold you back. I really believe there isn't an excuse to doing what you love to do. We all have excuses. "I don't have time." I have to work." "The kids need me." I don't have the money."

      Well, it's time to stop with the excuses and just do it. I didn't have a computer for the longest time because of a house fire. I still wrote though. I did it because I wanted to maintain my growth. Granted, no one could read my journal to save their lives, but, I can; and that's all that matters.

      I write because I love it. I create whole worlds just because I can. After all the only person who says I can't that would be right, would be me.

Thank you Tami Snow for sharing with me and for asking me to be your partner on our future endeavour. You always amaze me as a fellow artist...smiles...hugs...

Remember, for those who are reading this, live by this credo: Above all else, entertain.

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A Single Moment

      Sisters. They are always there when you need them. They are your best friend and most important confidante. Who listens to you ramble about everything and nothing and listens to all your fears without judging you? For me, it's my sister Chantell. She is my little sister, but I swear she has an old soul. When I need advice, I turn to her first. She is always able to see things farther along the path then I am and her advice is always right on the spot. When she isn't sure of something, she researches it like a mad woman. When she sets her mind on something, it happens. I don't know about you, but my sister Chantell is one of the most important people in my life.

      My other sister is named Natashia. She is a beautiful young woman. She is our baby sister. I often feel like I'm watching out for her, even when she doesn't need it. Natashia is a single mom. I know what that's like. It makes it hard to go through life at times. However, she is able to make it all look so easy. Both of my sisters are my best friends. They are part of my soul and everything I am. Without them, I'm not sure I would have had the courage to do make it through everything that has happened in my life. What a GREAT joy they are.

The following was sent by a friend of mine named Jean Johnson. She is an amazing woman. Her strength is awesome.

Jean Johnson

I remember so well. Just as it was yesterday, the very first time I saw my lifelong friend. She was always taller than me. Braver than me,sort of a dare devil. We were four and five years old when we first met. I'm eleven months older than ...her. We would sit on the bed and combed each others hair and till this day, we do the same thing. We were always so close,closer than sisters. We have never had a disagreement,


we except each other for who the other one is.If someone hurts one,they have hurt us both.She moved two hours away from me to take a higher paying job ten years ago and we got so busy we did not get to see each other or talk much,maybe once a month,we'd catch up on the phone. About two years ago she called me and I knew right away something wasn't right, I could tell it in her voice. She told me she had to have surgery and it was cancer,the worst kind, lymphoma. I panicked...she was trying to calm me down...I remember saying...What am I going to do if I lose you? You're the only person on earth that truly understands me and knows me. I was crying so hard I was choking. Yes, I sounded so selfish,but she was there for me, just as we both had always been for each other and excepted each others weaknesses and strength. Remember,she is the bravest one. She had her surgery and went through her treatments. She smiled,while I cried and worried myself ragged. This moment taught me to never let one single day go by and take it for granted. I call her everyday or she calls me. We visit each other often. She has been cancer free for two years and it's been the best two years of our lives. I love her so and I know what she'd say if you ask her if she loves. Of course I do! She's my sister.
 
 
I know how she feels about here sister. If anything happened to either of my sisters, I would be lost. Thank you Jean for sharing about your sister. Sisters are the best people in the world!!

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A Single Moment

      Mind over matter. Seems like such a simple phrase, doesn't it? Just three little words. By itself it says I'm stronger than what I'm living through. Can mind over matter change a person's life? Can it go to the point of saving a person's life? What a powerful concept that is!! The power of the mind can do many things that science can't explain. We as human beings are still in the infant stages of understanding the power of the mind. At least from a scientific point of view. What about the spiritual point of view? Those who believe in the awe inspiring power of some being larger and greater then ourselves, are able to say that through him or her, all things are possible.

      The following was sent to me by a fellow blogger and a very good friend of mine. Her name is Rachel Cook. Her blog is in my links, it's called Tarot By Rachel. I read it all the time. Her wisdom is amazing and for some reason she always seems to touch on something I'm going through at that moment. Could it be that she is channeling me at that moment...I don't know. What I do know is her story is one of such strength, that it deserves to be shared. If this doesn't inspire you to go on no matter what, I'm not sure anything can.

RACHEL COOK

      After years of suffering with sinus trouble, I finally decided to take the plunge and seek out relief through sinus surgery. In a single day I had three surgeries which straightened my septum, cleared my sinuses and removed my tonsils. What was supposed to be a 2.5 hour surgery ended up being 5 hours, because the inside of my sinuses and throat were, as my doctor described them, "Worse than Kuwait." Thankfully I had worked for my job long enough to not only have great health coverage, but my time off from work was also covered under FMLA.


      Less than six weeks after this surgery, I came down with a horrible illness. Every time I stood up I would become dizzy and nauseated, I was very fatigued and had no energy, this went on for days. I went to the doctor and was told I had a stomach flu, after being given some meds to make me more comfortable I was sent home to rest. Some days went by and I was getting worse, not better. It was frightening to be so ill, not just because I was missing quite a bit of work (thankfully covered by FMLA also) but also because I was living alone and didn't have the energy to walk from one room in my tiny apartment, let alone walk my dog to the end of the block. I returned to the doctor and he grew concerned at the deterioration of my condition, the swollen size of my lymph nodes and a host of other symptoms he found troubling. He decided to draw some blood, thinking I was dehydrated. What I didn't expect was over the course of the next three weeks I would find myself being tested for multiple forms of cancer and quarantined due to an alarming lack of white blood cells. In short, my body was shutting down, not healing itself and growing weaker with each new pathogen I encountered.

      Throughout all of this, it was noted that my thyroid was enlarged, but this was considered a secondary concern next to my veritably absent immune system.

      My doctor was troubled by all of this and scheduled an appointment with an oncologist so I could undergo more tests for various blood cancers, his thought was that perhaps I had contracted a very rare form of leukemia. The nurse at the cancer center drew six phials of blood, and moments before I was prepped for a bone marrow biopsy, the blood specialist met with me to say that although my white blood cell count was low, it was on the threshold of "normal" and whatever had caused my immune system to shut down for three weeks appeared to be on its way out. Of course my doctor was still concerned about my enlarged thyroid and once I was given the all-clear to return to work, I was scheduled to met with yet another specialist, this time an endocrinologist.

      As it turned out, over the years (no one really knows how long) I had contracted Graves disease (an overactive thyroid), which then caused my thyroid to become cancerous. I'd spent so many years suffering from sinus trouble that any additional ills brought on by thyroid trouble (believe me, there are more than I can mention here) were completely lost on me. This probably would have never been discovered had I not become so ill from a mysterious virus. Within a few months of becoming sick to the point of quarantine, I was quarantined once again, this time to undergo chemotherapy and radiation treatment to obliterate my cancerous thyroid. I'm proud to say that I've been Cancer free for over a year now. Even though I will have to take synthetic thyroid hormones for the remainder of my life and have blood drawn every six weeks, I'm glad to do it. Because I know what it is to feel sick and utterly helpless, and I know it's not a feeling I ever want to experience again.

      Which of these days equate to "that single moment"? All of them, each time I said to myself, "I refuse to go on being sick." .

      I'm going to repeat her last phrase: "I refuse to go on being sick."
 
     For the argument about mind over matter, I have to say that yes, it can save a life. The power of positive thinking is such an amzing thing. It changes lives everyday. It makes you climb to new heights and even gives you a second chance. A single moment is all it takes to think, "I refuse to go on like this." It's at that point in life, where you have decided to make a commitment to yourself. What an amazing moment that is. Though it was a doctor that saved Rachel's life, it was actually her positive spirit and will not to give in that made it possible. I know for me, the next time I think my life sucks, I'm going to remember Rachel. Her story has changed my life. Thank you Rachel for everything...smiles...hugs...

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A Single Moment

       As you know, the first part of my blog on Monday's is about a novel I've read. The one I'm going to talk about today is HOST by Stephanie Myers. I'm sure by now, everyone knows who Stephanie Myers is. She is the writer of the Twilight Saga.
    
       The novel Host came out before Twilight. I have read all of her novels that are out so far and to me, this one is by far one of her best. It's a love triangle with a twist. One of the characters involved in the love triangle is a parasite, named Wanderer, that has taken over the body of a female named Melanie, who has no intentions of going away peacefully. Melanie fills the Wanderer's mind with visions of the man she is in love with named Jared. As time goes on, Wanderer is filled with a human desire to see her lover and feel his touch again.

      This is such a cool take on the love triangle. It shows the power of love and all that the human spirit is willing to go through in order to make love happen again. The fact that it's told through the eyes of the alien parasite named Wanderer, makes it an even more riveting tale. You want end up wanting them all to make it, even though you know it means one of them will have to die. Stephanie Myers told a GREAT love story...smiles...

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      The story I have talked about is also about Balance. The balance between good and evil and the grey in between no one ever talks about. For the most part, I think we live in the grey area. We don't always do what is right, but we aren't always wrong either. We make the bones of our everyday life and fill it in as we go along. What would we do without the balance? If we were all good, how would we know we have it good?  How would we know to cherish those moments in life that make it all worth living. How would we even know when something was wrong? Without the grey, would we all walk around like shiny happy people who are in serious need of a slap in the face?

      The following two moments were sent to me by two different people.

Lisa Fitzpatrick

The moment I realised that the man I'd run to when my life went to crap, had actually *caused* said crap. That's when I knew I could only rely on myself.
Sad, but true. And I'm ok with that. 

For those of you who don't know Lisa, then you're missing out. She is one of the funniest, smartest and most beautiful women out there. Her strength is amazing.

Jessi Wilson Larie

When my friends and family stepped in to help me out after I had refused any help and ended up in the hospital with stress related symptoms. I came home to see they had all stepped in to help me out with house work and kids and even paid my rent. Though no one has fessed up to it. I realized I was not invincible, and I... did matter to people. I love you all ( you know who you are!)

Jessi is also a very good friend of mine. She is one of those people who knows when something is wrong even when you don't say it. Her intuition is so right on every time, it blows my mind. Her heart is bigger than probably anyone you know.

      The point to both of these is simply this, we all live in the grey. We aren't all good nor all bad. These two women came to a different side to a single coin. Neither side was good or bad. In fact, I'm sure it's all grey. At the end of the day. When all is said and done, if we are able to sleep good, then the grey we live in is more light then we realize. Who we are as people and how we treat each other is what matters most. To live in the grey is actually a good thing. It's where we all are...most of the time.

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A Single Moment

      Can a dream change your life? That's a question that I wonder a lot about.

      When I was a kid, I used to pretend that I was really a princess who was lost. I did this when my sister and I would get in a fight and I would end up being the one to get in trouble. I was sure the reason was because I didn't really belong there and that there was a huge castle with people looking for me. I imagined a whole kingdom was sad because I was gone.

      As I grew up, that dream faded along with a lot of the other thoughts I had for my life. I still had dreams about what I wanted to do with my life, they just no longer involved being a princess. I accepted my fate. For the longest time I was sure that meant I had to take what I was given and swallow it. It didn't matter that I wanted to sky dive or climb a mountain. As life continued, it didn't matter what I put out there, I was doomed not to succeed. I was destined to be with a man who was abusive, someone who lied to me all the time and no matter what: I was destined to not succeed in anything I tried to do.

      All that changed one night. I had a dream. Oddly enough, I dreamt I was talking to Biggie Smalls AKA the Notorious B.I.G. I don't know why. I wasn't even a huge fan of his. When he was alive I was too busy being a punk rock kid, annoying my parents and coming home late. I didn't start listening to his music until a couple years ago. What a shame someone took that big hearted man away.  But what he said to me changed the way I viewed things. He told me that I wasn't finished yet and that I needed to keep going and I was on the right path. I was just beginning to write the novel I'm working on now. I spoke with a friend of mine about this. She said that it was a message from beyond. Truth be told, I don't know if that's true. What I do know is this, It changed the way I viewed everything I had tried in my life. It made me believe that everything I had been through in life lead me to this point. It made me start to believe again.

      Belief in yourself is something that is needed to accomplish anything in life. How can you give your kids the confidence they need to make it in life if you don't believe in yourself? The simplest answer is you can't.  I love that my kids know I'm trying to get published. I love knowing they are seeing that I'm not giving up, no matter what. Believe. See it. Know it. Live it. It's not always easy, but it is possible.

      The following is a story shared by a friend of mine named Tessa Schlesinger

      Dreams change me... 2 1/2 decades ago, I used to dream of snakes every single night. I did so for years. Then, one day I heard a broadcast on how Carl Jung interpreted dreams. Using the same method, I interpreted my snake nightmare. Turned out I was petrified of people. I decided to shoot the snakes in my dreams - and ...I did. I lost my fear of people. That method helped me to conquer PTSD (Most South Africans my age have it.) and many other difficulties. Last night I had a yukky dream again, but using that interpretation method, I know what it means, and from years of experience, I know that the moment I understand the dream, the condition changes. When I understood what dreams were and how interpreting them accurately could change one's life forever, it was truly a moment that changed my life forever!

      The original question, Can a dream change your life? For me, I have to say yes. They are the reason some people shoot for the stars and keep going no matter what. They make life and imagination possible. What a wonderful thing dreams are...

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A single moment is all it takes

      A single moment is all it takes to make a decision that will change your life. Really, that's it. Just make sure it's what you want. The closer I have gotten the finishing my novel the more nervous I have felt. It isn't something that I want to feel. It's an old habbit I'm trying to break.

      We all go through moments in our lives where we wonder, am I doing the right thing. Will it work out? Can I make it or am I just spinning my wheels? I know that for the last couple months I have been asking myself those same questions over and over again. I don't know why, or where they came from. I'm pretty sure it's caused from a fear of failure.

      I have been taking the advice of friends and been putting that out of my mind and focusing on the more positive. The facts are that I'm really getting GREAT feed back about what I'm writing both here on the blog and in my current novel. I have an awesome support system at home. A great family and group of friends who care enough about me to listen to me ramble on when I need to. I have to say that happens more often then anyone who reads this knows.

      When I start to question myself, I ask John what he thinks. He always tells me to stop wondering and finish. He believes in me. That's worth more to me than gold. I'm also lucky to have a couple friends whose whole heart is with me on this journey. They are my confidants and closest advisors. They have walked me through, almost holding my hand the whole way. It's all these people that are a gift to me. I can't thank them enough for listening and reading.

      Is it any wonder that I would feel a certain amount of fear because I don't want to diappoint these people? Thanks to the advice of a friend named Rachel, I no longer think about it in those terms of failure or success. I look at the whole journey and am thankful I'm able to do any of this at all. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. Thanks to the encouragement from John, my sister Chantell, and a dear friend named James, I have been able to keep writing with the knowledge that there are people who like what I'm doing and believe in me. Even when I didn't believe in myself.

      I know that I said the miracles event was over, but I want to say that for me, one of those small big miracles is the fact that these people have been put in my life. I don't question if they are coming from a place of honesty. They have been honest with me when I didn't want to hear it. I don't question their motives. They care because that's who they are. I'm so thankful for those people.

      I have been learning that belief in yourself starts with one choice. It's a single commitment that you make to yourself. For everyone it's a different thing. When you make that choice, and you follow it through, the universe finds a way to make sure that you have a support system right there to guide you along the path. For myself, the path is one that is filled with rejection, heartache and wonder. It is something I have been preparing my whole life for. For me, when it came time to make this decision, there was no other choice. It was just, do it. Make it work. Take all that I have learned and toss the chips.

      What more can a person ask for in life than a handful of friends and family whose love and devotion make it possible to seek out your dreams and make them happen?

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Writing...My Favorite Passion

      I sit here everyday at the computer and write. I write this blog and I work on my novel I AM WOLF. I'm proud to say that it's on the final leg of the journey. At least,the bones are almost finished. I say that word a lot when I talk about my writing....Bones...

      Why do I do it? Why sit here pounding on the keyboard day after day, writing a novel and try to get into a business when I know there is a lot of rejection? I love it. It's a short answer I know, but it's the best one there is. I love to write. It takes me away to another world. My mind is always coming up with what if ideas. I have a whole file full of small paragraphs and observations. There is a section for names and even one that has a list of what ifs.

      When someone reads something I have written and says something about it, it makes my whole day. It means that someone took the time to get into my head for just a little while. When you have read what I have written, hopefully I was able to take you on an adventure full of life and love and even scared you a little. As long as you were entertained by what I have written, then I have done my job.

      One day I hope to be doing this for a living. I want to see my novel in black and white. I want to know that people have enjoyed it. Pushing it to the limit and not looking back, that's what I hope I've done. There is a lot of talent out there. Some who are noticed right off the bat and others who have to work hard to make it to the big leagues. I have written a total of three novels. I AM WOLF is my third. The other two are sitting on a disk somewhere collecting dust. I consider them practice.

      I have not now, nor will I ever come to the page light, without boldness or purpose. The blank page is a canvass that needs to be painted. It needs life and color through the characters that will live there. It is a world in need of creation. It calls my name like nothing else in the world has. That is why I do it. That's why I put the bones out there.

      I sit here at this keyboard everyday and I wonder what I'm going to write about on this blog, unsure that there is anyone who is going to see what I'm thinking about at that moment. That's ok though. It's something I love to do.

      I had the following conversation a lot of times with a lot of different people.

      "I'm thinking about writing."  He said.
      "Really, that's great. Have you ever written anything before?"  I ask.
      "No, but it looks like fun." he says.
      "It is. Who are your favorite writers?" I ask.
      "I don't really have time to read." He says.
      "Oh." I say.

      Stephen King wrote, if you don't have time to read, you don't have time to write.

      I have to say that I agree with him all the way. Writing takes practice. It takes a lot of time and effort. It takes a commitment and a personal willingness to not only put yourself out there, but a willingness to be rejected on every level. It takes an understanding that no matter what, you need to grow and learn from your past mistakes and move on to the next project. It isn't something that should ever be taken light.

      When I write, I push the boundaries. At least that's what I hope I'm doing. In I AM WOLF, I hope that I have written something that will not only entertain you the reader, but I'm hoping that it will make you cringe in some places and laugh in others. I hope that you will see the characters and feel the ringer I have put them through. I hope that you visit your dark side but root for the hero. When all is said and done, and the novel is read, I hope that I have entertained. Above all else, entertained. If I have done that, then I have done my job.

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Laughter and Kids Equals Fun

      I took all the kids and a few of their friends to the thrift store today. It's something I like to do because I can give them all a couple dollars and they can look around and find little treasures they want and it doesn't cost me a lot of money.

      The kids wondered around and found a few items that were cute and they all had fun. The clothes this store puts out are always in good shape and most of the time you can find clothes with the tags on them. They usually have brand name things, all you have to do is look. It's set up like any department store. There is a kids section with adorable displays, a jewelry display case with some of the most beautiful pieces you have ever seen.

      The store has a women's section and a men's section. There is a small room that is full of books that is put together like a library. There is a chair in there to sit on while you search through the books that are all lined on the shelves that go from the ceiling to the floor. The room has that wonderful book smell. I'm pretty sure it's my favorite space there.

      I helped the kids look through the clothes and walked out with two bags of beautiful new used clothes along with a beautiful laced twin bedspread all for around fifteen dollars. I couldn't believe it. There are a lot of people who think it's below them to buy clothes from a place like that. They wouldn't think about going into a shop where everything has another person's history. I don't look at it like that. When I walk into that store, I'm greeted by friendly people. The money goes to help people who need it and to a missionary fund. I feel like I not only was able to contribute in assisting others, but I was also able to make my children and their friends happy. What more could I ask for?

      The sign of the times is more about how little money it takes to make a group of children happy. All it really takes is a little time and a lot of laughter.

    

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Family

      I have a friend who is going through somewhat of a crisis right now. He has written a novel that's based on his life. The novel looks like it's going to be a GREAT success. The problem he is having is that it is based on his family and they aren't very happy about it.

      Family, that single word is suppose encompass unconditional love. That I will always be there for you no matter what. The whole reason we are here is because of our family. I have been blessed with a wonderful family. They have supported me even when I myself didn't know what I was doing. They may have looked at me a little weird, or even not understood why I had to do some of the things I have done. At the end of the day though, they still loved me no matter what.

      My dad is a retired Navy man. Throughout his life he has always been a good example for me. He may have made a few mistakes with me, but so far as I know, he didn't. I'm pretty sure he is one of the wisest men I know, and so far he has not been wrong. Though he would humbly disagree. Even though he has no idea what entails writing a novel and trying to get the word out, he supports me with it all the way. I'm sure that he wonders once in a while what the hell I was thinking when I decided to do this. After all, it isn't a normal 9 to 5 kind of job. It's one of those risk it all and let the chips fall where they may sort of things. He isn't really a big fan of those. Still though, at the end of the day, no matter what, he supports me and loves me.

      My mom is the same way. She is mother earth incarnated in human form. By that I mean that she is able to grow anything, anywhere at anytime. I have seen her bring plants back to life when they were all but dead. She is an artist. Her work is beautiful. She has some paintings and well you name it in the art world she has done it. She is never afraid to let her creative spirit roam free and see where it takes her. She is also a pillar of strength who has taken everything life has thrown at her and said, "I can make it work." She is where I get my motto from.

      I have been blessed in more ways than one. They may not always get me, but they support me in all my little adventures. In that respect, I have been lucky. I guess it's the reason I will never understand why a family would turn their backs on you. I can't think of a single person in my family that would do that. Now, I'm not saying that we always agree. That would be weird because we are all individuals, but; when it comes down to it, they are there for me no matter the situation.

      For my friend, my heart goes out to you, and I have no doubt that my family would adopt you just because you have been my friend. Remember that you are not alone in this world. There are people who will support you no matter what. That sometimes you just have to make a family of your own to get that unconditional love and support.

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